What is it about humans that makes us hurt the people we love the most? What compulsion is it that drives us to betray the very ones we want to protect from all pain?
Honestly, for most of us, it’s not that we want to cause pain. Nobody wants to hurt the people they love; nobody wants to know that they’ve disappointed the people whose opinions matter the most to them. But people are complicated, and beneath this apparent desire we have to do good, we are inherently selfish beings. If we really take a good look at our motives, we do things in order to make ourselves look good. And if we do something hurtful, it's because that's who we truly are.
We can be philosophical and say that, deep down, it is because we have been hurt ourselves and it is a way to protect ourselves. Hurt people hurt people. Or we could say that we are all good people with no evil intent and all our efforts are just misunderstood.
Or we could be honest. We could be honest with others and with ourselves and admit that, deep down, we are all evil. We hurt and betray and cause pain because, in the deepest part of our beings, that is what we are naturally inclined to do. We betray our friends, we drive away those we love, we ignore those who want to help us, we disappoint those who trust us… And we can cover that up in philosophy or poetry; we can lie to others and to ourselves, but the truth is: we are not good. I am not good.
As it is written: “There is none righteous, no, not one… Romans 3:10
When a person is born again, we become new. We still have that sinful nature, but now there is a new nature in us: that of Christ. Now it becomes a war inside us, between our old selfish, sinful nature and the new person.
For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Romans 7:18-19
And this, simply put, is why we need God. Without God, there is nothing good within us. This doesn’t mean that, once we have accepted Him as the ruler of our lives, we will be perfect. However, we do have this promise from Him:
Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6
Life is a journey. For a follower of God, the end of that journey means total sanctification; perfection. But for now I know that the only good that is in me, is that which God does through me.
